OLD KING MOOSE

Some times when I go through my many notebooks I find discarded poems, that I've given up on or has abandoned for various reasons. Mostly due to a writers block or I think it plain sucks. Some times I come back to it later and try to salvage it. I decided to give this another go and do some re-writes and tweak a bit here and there. This is more of a limerick, and frankly very silly. Bottom line is I simply had to complete something with a name like Old King Moose.

Old king moose
was a big recluse
Who lived in the Kodal woods
He'd sit on a throne
made of pine cones
and bitch that he was misunderstood

He hates his queen
who is ugly and mean
Large like an overfed bear
She'd talk far too long
about everything wrong
How her life was in need of repair

She was seeing a shrink
a skunk with a stink
Who told her to have an affair
Instead of divorce
get it on with a horse
or cozy up to a deer

Old king moose
was guzzling the booze
What a miserable sod he'd become
Drinking his Jack
Smokin' his crack
Taking baths in a whirpool or rum

He'd pull out a gun
for a quick bit of fun
Russian roulette he would play
Squeezin' the trigger
as he did figure
If I die it will brighten my day

But with his luck running poor
He hit the darn door
Too wasted to aim at his head
With a bullet astray
wild on it's way
Killing his butler instead

Old king moose
was tying his shoes
When he tumbled out the bell tower
A long way down
But he landed safe and sound
Before being knocked dead by a meteor shower

The queen took it well
a conniving little Jezebelle
Was so sure she had it made
Put on a ball
Quite lavish and all
She even threw herself a parade

But Old king moose
Don't like to lose
He'd cut her out of his will
He gave every penny
to a beaver named Benny
who hangs out at the local gin mill.